Band Geek Dictionary

These definitions have been found during a search of the internet at various other web sites and compiled here....

Term	Definition
3/4 TIME	A way to keep the band continuously out of step.
ADJUSTED STEP	When a freshman band member takes a large step to the side after a section leader has already marked them off.
AIR	The driving force behind brass instruments, but generally lacks in woodwinds, therefore causing squeaks.
ALTO SAXOPHONE	A musical instrument that either plays very loud or not at all between squeaks.
ARC	A shape with between one and five corners and one or more open sides.
ATTENTION	Standing still while sticking out your butt. Can only talk in whispers so that no section leaders hear you. Something drummers lack.
AUXILIARY	See color guard.
BAIL	That which one does on a wet field. Generally, the person who bails (the bailer) winds up on the ground (the bailee).
BAND CAMP	A time of gathering between most band geeks (including color guard) during August where they learn how to pass out on cue due to the mildly warm Texas sun.
BAND DIRECTOR	1. A very "ROCKY" individual, although very "HALE" and hearty, willing to take "CHANCES" to make their band the best. 2. The person who claims to be in charge when everything is going well and claims denial when things go wrong.
BAND GEEK	Someone who is very enthusiastic and involved in band. Willing to give up all free time. The band counterpart to choir nerds and orchestra dorks.
BAND JACKET	a.k.a. Letter Jacket 1. Status symbol. 2. Proclamation of true geekdom. NOTE: The ultimate geek will have lettered all four years.
BAND PARENTS	The only parents that a band geek sees between August and December. The only reason the band holds together.
BAND PARTY	A gathering of Band Geeks where they can wear their Band Jackets, play cards, and complain about the latest rehearsal and upcoming games.
BAND SHIRT	An article of clothing that is washed once a year. A key part of a band geek's uniform.
BAND TAN	What a band geek receives when they wear shorts and socks to all practices outside in the blazing Texas sun.
BARI-SAXOPHONE	An instrument for woodwind players who want to play like a tuba.
BARITONE	A device for doubling with trombones except using the right notes. Also used for playing during silence.
BASS CLARINET	A concert instrument that, when used properly, is still not heard.
BASSOON	An unusual hybrid between a bass clarinet and oboe which remains unused in marching.
BATHROOM OF DOOM	An object designed to really get to know the people (and their characteristic smells) in the back of the bus.
BATTERY	See drum line.
BEARING	Something band directors do to their students one week before contest.
BELL-DINGING	A physical symbol of a mistake made in the last move. Usually followed by 'shups.
BELL-FRONT INSTRUMENT	Always brass, these are directional instruments designed to play extremely loud and characteristically, out of tune.
BIG BROTHER/BIG SISTER	Designated person who gives candy, drinks, toys, and wishes of good luck to a new member of the band. The cover is "band unity," but it's really an excuse to get good stuff!
BI-SECTIONAL	The term given to one who plays different instruments for different ensembles.
BLOCK BAND	Something that poorly-made floats in a parade do well.
BRAIN FART	A mistake involving an escape of gaseous substances from the head usually in conjunction with missing a set.
BRASS	Metallic looking and sounding devices designed to over-blow and blast.
BUS	1. A good way to get to know someone (nudge, nudge, wink, wink), however the most painful way in the world to watch a movie. Also known for the Bathroom of Doom. 2. The only way to see a pigeon at 65 MPH.
CADENCE	A way of making the crowd forget the parade march the band just played that impresses people. A way to impress people at games and pep rallies. Good time for band section visuals.
CARDS	52 rectangular devices of equal size and width which each have respective numbers, symbols, and colors on them which keep band geeks continually entertained.
CARRIAGE	Means carrying your body plus your horn after a parade in 90 degree weather.
CHAIR	A device used for good luck at competitions and to increase the vibe amongst geeks. See how high you rank on the food chain in your section.
CIRCLE	A closed shape with definite corners and edges.
CLARINET	A device which, when used properly, will cause the user's shoulders to point towards the end-zone. Often, more annoying than a saxophone.
COLLAR	Something thy hair shalt never toucheth.
COLOR GUARD	People who swing flags and toss rifles to distract the audience's attention away from the band. Makes the band seem better. Get extra credit if they hit (accidentally, of course) a band member, yet defied if they hit a field judge.
COMPANY FRONT	A zigzag line within a certain area of the field, such as a hash: ~~~~~~
COMPETITION	A general gathering of band geeks to show that each one's band is better than the others.
CONCERT	Extremely dangerous form of torture for both students and audience. Fatal if used in durations exceeding one hour.
CONCERTO	A musical piece that is written for the express reason of singling out one single player from the band to humiliate himself alone in a performance.
CONDUCTING	The drum major's method of amusing the band to points of laughter at times.
CONDUCTOR	The person in the front who waves his arms and dances wildly to the music. Constantly marks time during halts. See drum major.
CONTRA	A tuba that is snapped onto and off of the player's shoulder. Designed to build-up arm muscles and decrease brain activity. A name that is sexier than "sousaphone."
CONTRA BASS CLARINET	A large, metallic, clarinet-like instrument that is designed to play in the range of a tuba, but is often mistaken for the kitchen sink.
COVER DOWN	An excuse to yell at the flutes in front of you.
CRESCENDO TURN	An obsolete action, which means, "It sucked."
DCI	Drum corps championship series.
DEATH MARCH	The last quarter mile of the 4th of July parade.
DIAGONAL	Something trumpets say if they dislike the idea of an angle in "their" show.
DIRECTOR	The person who claims to be in charge when everything is going well and claims denial when things go wrong.
DISKETTES	Devices made to be thrown in a similar style to that of a Frisbee across the marching field prior to rehearsals. This action can also be done with CDs.
DISTANCE	Is something you want to keep with the band director if you're a trombone player a week before contest.
DIVINE COMEDY	Watching the drum major attempt to keep a correct tempo.
DOLLAR BILL	A device for cleaning saxophone pads. A form of currency among band geeks.
DOUBLE REED	A good way to make a band member's face look like they just ate a lemon.
DRESS	Something you wouldn't mind seeing your band director in.
DRESS LEFT/RIGHT/CENTER	A wonderful way to break your neck.
DRILL	Pages that show what a form is supposed to look like. Should be burned at year's end.
DRILL BOOK	A small notebook to be kept in pocket that has complex drawings and strange numbers that people say are their spots for each picture. Designed to keep people from learning music.
DRILL TEAM	Besides the color guard, the half-time entertainment that has enough rhythm to dance as one.
DRILL-DOWN	When band geeks follow long sets of commands from the drum major, just to see who can do it, in an attempt at fun. It is only "fun" when this name is used, however, not during rehearsal.
DRUM	Round hollow devices with covering on the top and sometimes the bottom. Sometimes have some sort of attachments on the bottom. Loud.
DRUM CAPTAIN	The leader of the percussion section who's main requirement for the job is to not be able to hold a steady tempo.
DRUM CORPS	Very similar to marching band, except for a few differences: 1) They are good. 2) No woodwinds or brass. Coincidence?
DRUM LINE	The people hitting the drums (or each other) with sticks in time with each other, but either a half beat earlier or later than the band and one beat from the pit.
DRUM MAJOR, HEAD	Person with the dubious distinction of keeping the animals in line on a field and in the band room during marching season. Loses all power and the little respect they do get after the end of November.
DRUM MAJOR, JUNIOR	Senior drum major's lackey. Heir apparent to Head Drum Major.
DRUM MAJOR, SENIOR	Takes over for head drum major when not available.
DRUM TAP	A snare beat loud enough for the judges to hear, and quiet enough so band doesn't hear.
DUM LINE	Another name for drum line. Used secretly among rest of the band.
DYNAMICS	Either loud or louder (volume).
EARLY	To never be. Reasoning: To be early is to be on time, while to be on time is to be late, but to be late is to never be. Following this through, early is to never be.
ECHO	What a band geek should hear after a good cut-off. I'm not sure what it sounds like, though, so I can't explain it.
EXECUTION	What the band goes through at band camp.
EXPONENTIAL GROWTH	The mathematical reasoning behind the fact that when one flute graduates, two new freshmen take her place.
F. C. P. L.	A brass dynamic marking that stands for "Forget Control - Play Loud!"
FIELD	100 yards in length, this is a wide expanse of mud on which bands perform. Contained within the area of this expanse are frequent sprinklers with occasional patches of grass.
FILE	a LINE...DUH!
FLASH CUBE	A small object containing four light bulbs that is activated by littering the ground with paper clips. The object of these devices is to blind all marchers. This is an excellent method for creating free-form moves.
FLOATING THE EYES	Same as rolling the eyes.
FLUTE	An un-tuned device, for people who want to be in the band, but have weak arms and don't wish to be heard.
FOOD	"Fuel" for band geeks. Is an attacker of performance uniforms, but can still be eaten (in secrecy) in this state of being.
FOOTBALL TEAM	The main reason the band can't always use the marching field.
FORMER BAND GEEK	The name given to a person who was in band, quit, and now returns (usually with food) to rehearsals to watch just for fun.
FORTE	The lowest dynamic marking a brass instrument can play at.
FRENCH HORN	Only brass instrument that is played with left hand. Involves strings in conjunction with valves and an impossibility to play fast or loud.
FRESHMEN	Designed to make up half the size of the band.
FUND-RAISERS	Opportunities provided throughout the year for the adult staff to yell at band members while making a few extra bucks on the side.
GEEKDOM	The state of a band member who is willing to give up all free time during season.
GEEKISM	Something that is related to marching band which just spontaneously happens (such as walking with friends down the hall in step or whistling warm-ups or scales without thinking about it).
GENERAL AFFECT	What you call when everyone in the band gradually gets sick.
GLIDE STEP	Wheee!
GLOVES	A natural method of scientific proof that there are two types of dirt: Dark dirt that is attracted to light objects and light dirt which is attracted to dark objects!
GONG	A loud, large cymbal-like device. It is the goal of all good percussionists to break or crack this instrument in any way possible.
GRADUATED BAND GEEK	Someone who no longer attends the school, is over-age for a drum corps or feels they can't cut it in drum core and now returns to rehearsals to watch just for fun. Begs Mr. Harris to play.
HALT	A time when everyone is theoretically stopped.
HARMONY	All voices except the melody and percussion.
HIGH-MARK-TIME	An action that only occurs when the marcher is standing on mud.
HIT	Wham!
HORN-POP	A method to keep the pit from going completely deaf when brass instruments pass directly behind them by pointing bells toward the sky. Not recommended for flutes or clarinets.
INSTRUCTOR	Person who tells you when you're screwing up.
INSTRUMENT	A device used for torture.
INTERVAL	1. A space between two band members that is random. 2. The space between you and your band director one week before contest.
IQ	A constant, combined number that does not change as the size of the band does.
JAZZ BAND	Cool.
KEYBOARD	The layout of most pit instruments.
LAPS	An alternate to 'shups, although not as effective.
LATE	The opposite of early. A new band member will learn the fine art of being late, and coming up with a ridiculous lie to cover up one's lateness. See 'shups.
MACE	A heavy stick with a shiny end, designed to be dropped.
MALLET	Something which can only be thrown at stupid band kids.
MARCHING BARITONE	A version of a baritone created based on enhancements over the successful design of a Marching French Horn. a.k.a. Mellophone.
MARCHING SHOES	Ugly, comfy, relatively inexpensive. Coincidence?
MARK-TIME	A time when people only move their feet (without changing location) to some tempo, usually "to the beat of a different drum." A question asked of Mark.
MELLOPHONE	An instrument designed to be unable to tune, kill all freshman who attempt to keep the horn up, and make it impossible to snap. a.k.a. marching French horn.
MELODY	The loudest voice, usually carried by the trumpets or piccolos.
MEMORIZATION	An action that is supposed to take place in conjunction with sets and music between band camp and the commencement of the regular year, but does not generally happen, except for the drum majors and few section leaders, until 'shups are issued or the year is completed.
MEZZO-FORTE	The highest dynamic marking of any woodwind excluding the piccolo.
MEZZO-PIANO	Dynamic marking which means that trumpets play as loud as they can while the rest of the band plays moderately quiet.
MISTING	The meteorological term that the adult staff use for saying, "OK, it's raining a little but you'll live."
MOUTHPIECE	A critical piece to a brass instrument which is meant to be dropped 30 feet through stands and/or sometimes in mud. Droppage of this device often results in 'shups. Often seen flying from sousaphones during extreme movements. Also used to inflict pain upon lower classmen or other sections. See sticks.
MUSIC	1. Papers which contain little black lines and dots with strange symbols that somehow show what the music is to sound like. 2. The succession of these notes that, in theory, should sound good. Unfortunately, we're not all in Theory - we're in Band.
NOTES	1. Little round dots on lines that show the approximate pitch that the instrument player tries to hit. 2. The language of music, similar to "BASIC," "Pascal," or "C" for computers.
OBOE	A double-reed instrument used for obtaining a clarinet sound in a piccolo range, or in time of desperate need and crisis. Also sounds like a duck in heat.
ON TIME	To never be. See reasoning for early and late.
OVERLAY	A shiny part of the front of the uniform designed to enhance the effects of a flash cube.
PARADE-REST	A form of relaxation while standing up. Little talking, but some required to keep band geeks sane.
PEDAL	A low vibration tone produced by brass instruments when jaw is loosened. Noise is sometimes mistaken for the conventional brain fart.
PENCIL TEST	A test, often failed by freshmen, designed to help bell-front instrument players keep their horns up and even with the ground.
PERCUSSION	The group of instruments hit by sticks or mallets that keeps some beat or other.
PERFORMANCE	See concert.
PHASING	That noise you always hear 0.5 seconds after the band plays something.
PIANO	A form of "air-band" playing style. Also an item in which everyone in the band has pounded on at one point or another. They think they're Beethoven.
PICCOLO	A high-pitched instrument similar to that of the flute, only you can actually hear that it's out of tune.
PICCOLO TRUMPET	An instrument designed to do the same job as a trumpet with some minor enhancements - since it's an octave higher.
PIGEONS	A truly unique bird that has only one known natural enemy: The windshield of a bus at 65 MPH.
PIT	Percussion instruments that have pitches (like a piano) that play either half a beat earlier or later than the band, opposite of the drum line.
PLUME	The most dangerous part of the full uniform because of it's flammability. Takes 2 seconds to burn properly.
POMP AND CIRCUMSTANCE	A painful form of obligation by every band geek during three of their four years in high school. An extremely useful and effective form of torture for underclassmen.
PRACTICE	The constant repetition of a sequence of notes in an unsuccessful attempt to become skilled. Usually drives family members either away from home or insane. Not needed if music is memorized by blankly staring at it during Economics.
PRECISION	Ha!!!
PSEUDO-GEEK	Somebody who isn't in band but thinks he is. Attends band parties, competitions, and rehearsals. This is not to be confused with a former band geek or graduated band geek. See also wannabe band geek.
PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION (P.D.A.)	A touchy (literally), debatable subject among band geeks. Something that happens regardless of what rules exist or peer pressure is made on people. Something that happens on the bus, in the stands, during water breaks, before and after rehearsals, during lunch and dinner breaks, at Band Parties, and just about anywhere else where the rest of the band is forced to watch a couple be disgustingly cutesy together.
RAIN	Nature's way of telling the band enough is enough and to go inside and practice music.
REED	1. A piece of wood that makes a great excuse for not playing well if broken or brand new. Usages: "Sorry, new reed," or "I broke my reed." 2. A device used to efficiently cut one's finger. NOTE: Doesn't taste good when ingested either. (It was a mistake)
REHEARSAL	Time used by band geeks to forget anything learned during practice.
RESETTING	Definitions vary by sections. Woodwind: Wander aimlessly for 3 minutes and talk quietly. Brass: Run as fast as you can back to your set yelling at the top of your lungs. Battery: Wander and swear as you walk slowly back to your set. Color Guard: Prance back to your set and avoid getting hit by stupid, yelling brass players. Pit: Sit there and laugh your head off while you watch these 3 minutes of confusion.
RIFLE	A white-colored piece of wood used by the color guard that is intended for injury of band or fellow color guard members and breakage of nails. See also color guard.
ROLL-STEP	Method in which a geek should walk if his shoes are round on the bottom. Not bouncing. Proper technique prevents inhalation of Astroturf.
RPG's	Another name for the drum line. Only they know the true meaning.
SABRE	A piece of color guard equipment which the guard prefers over rifles and is also more dangerous. Coincidence?
SECTION LEADER	Leader of a section (Duh!!!) who tries to keep their section out of complete chaos in order to make themselves look good.
SENIOR	A source of constant guilt trips.
SFZ-PIANO-CRESCENDO	The act of blatting, stopping, then blasting.
SHOW COORDINATOR	Person who creates and draws all of the inanimate useless objects that the band attempts to form.
'SHUPS	Sometimes called "pushups," these you do when something goes wrong due to you. Usually done in increments or multiples of ten or fifteen. Designed as a method of self-discipline.
SITTING-AROUND	An action carried out when sitting on busses or in stands, in which band members rely on perpetual motion to keep from sitting in the same place for more than 30 seconds.
SLOUCHING	An action best displayed by concert bands. Even if it's bad for playing, it's great for the back!
SMOOTH	Something saxophone players think they are.
SNAP	1. Instantly changing a horn's position from attention to 'horns up' or vice-versa. Havoc for someone in front of a snapped instrument. 2. Method of causing an instrument to spontaneously explode.
SOUSAPHONE	An instrument that adds bass to the band. Can play any note (as long as it's a low G).
SPACE-CHORD	A chord where each member plays whatever note he feels like. Used so that band members (especially freshmen who aren't used to us) get used to what we sound like.
SPRINKLERS	An offensive attacker of the pit and color guard.
SQUEAK	The only sign that woodwind reeds give that they are actually playing.
STANDING	What the brass-line does at band camp. Woodwinds do not accomplish this feat due to their weak legs (in most cases). There are a few exceptions to this weakness, but they don't stand anyway.
STICKS	Dropped by drummers. Also used as weapons in counterassault of mouthpiece attacks.
STRETCH OUT	A term geeks frequently misunderstand as "time to talk".
SUSPENDERS	The most effective way to strangle a band geek while still keeping their pants up.
TELEPHONE	A communication device that must be used by every member of the band following a football game.
TEMPO	The correct beat, usually (but not always) carried by the conductor.
TENOR-SAXOPHONE	An instrument similar to the bari-saxophone, except it matches the pitch of a trombone or baritone.
TIME	A way to keep the band continuously out of step.
TROMBONE	A device with the same pitch as a baritone, except that it uses a slide instead of valves, so it's easier to forget the positions.
TRUMPET	An instrument that is designed to make a band sound better. The idea is that if the trumpets play loud enough, you can't hear the rest of the band, so only the trumpets' mistakes are heard, not everyone else's.
TUBA	A concert sousaphone.
TUNE	What the condition when all instruments are within half a step of each other is called.
UNIFORM, FULL	A form of torture consisting of "Urkel" pants, black socks (or white socks colored with a black marker), a heavy wool jacket, a choking ugly hat (with a strikingly beautiful plume), and circulation-stopping suspenders.
UNIFORM, SUMMER	Consists of a green band shirt, khaki shorts, white socks and white shoes. This torturous device (although it is unanimously agreed upon that this is better than the full uniform) is inflicted during the 4th of July parade and first few football games.
VALVE	A key object on most brass instruments that sticks only during important performances and solos.
VALVE OIL	Exquisitely tasteful with a twist of lemon. A form of currency for brass players.
VIBE, The	A frequent occurrence after long exposure to fellow Band Geeks during intense competitions or rehearsals, usually resulting in obsessive compulsive behavior directed towards the band. Known effects are few and are rarely, if ever, reversible. Believed by some to be a sign of mental illness. Scientists are stumped, and frankly, don't care why it occurs.
VISUAL	A way of keeping marching band members busy during a show. Extra credit received if used against an on-field judge.
WANNABE BAND GEEK	Someone who hangs out with true band geeks.
WATER BREAK	An excuse for doing headstands on the field.
WOODWINDS	1. A true sign that God has a sense of humor. 2. A biological mistake.
XYLOPHONE	An instrument that is taken to parades but never marched.
YELLING	An expressive way of trying to prove that one is more committed than the next person. This is a self-destructive way of spending any rehearsal, yet we seem to continue in this practice more and more. This is often connected with "the vibe" and being intense.
YELLOW DOG	A yellow school bus.
Z-PULL	Drill maneuver performed by DCI Corps to make the crowd stand up.

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Comments to: Tony Claxton